cook on low heat with a cast iron skillet
So after years on hiatus, cheese melts returns. Why you ask? Because just yesterday I found myself laid off yet again. And honestly, I can say that it isn't as bad the second time around. The fear of getting fired is way worse than the fear of not having any money. Maybe there is some continuum with fear. I'll have to look into that.
Yeah -- so I thought I'd left those days behind me. Really I did. That either means that I'm totally delusional, it's too easy to slip back into old habits (even with the super mommy vibe), or switching jobs with an infant is completely insane. It is probably one of many of these things. Granted, I really dig what I'm doing. I'm learning a ton. I'm growing and stretching and all of those things. But I'm also doing that as a new mom. And on the friend side -- what friends? I've completely neglected them. It sucks. But today, I tried to turn back the clock. I tried to head back down the road of non-workaholic-ness. For the first time in 3 weeks, I did not bring my laptop home.
So now if I can just stop waking up at 4:30 am thinking about work (and then eventually working), and if I can leave work at a decent time (instead of getting home right as Wyatt is eating and oops -- then ready for bed, and if I can spend some time with my hottie, rather than blankly staring at my computer screen that is obviously not getting the work done on my behalf.
I need to learn very quickly the following skills:
--how to say no
--how to be mean
--how to not know how to do so much stuff
--how to act like i don't know how to do anything
Might be possible....check back and see.
I'm not one for going to readings. I mean, they always sound good in theory, but then I either don't know the writers, or I don't have time, or I'm not sure if it will really be cool. But I went to a reading last night by my two favorite writing instructors from the Loft -- and it was totally amazing! First, they both had amazing stories to read. Dale's was an excerpt -- it was chapter 1 of his recently finished novel. Which I totally wish was published because I would read it today. Rob's was a whole story and it was amazing. It had such an arc and such great language and dialogue. It was so great. And I got to see my favorite writers too -- it was just wonderful. And we got to hang out at Grumpys - which was weird with no smoking, but nice because I didn't reek when I got home.
I miss my writing classes. I can't quite figure out when I'd have time to write and go to class because I love hanging with my boy Wyatt, but one of these days, I need to get back to it. Because it feeds my soul.
It's my 100th post. I thought I'd see this day much sooner. It is all too obvious that my blog is as neglected as my garden. My garden in fact still has some beautiful and blooming roses, but not because I do much. In fact, I neglect them, but do try to give them water once a week and I feed them once a month. But I can't really remember the last time I watered or fed them. So who really know. But they are huge and beautiful. In spite of my neglect. Maybe someday my blog will be the same.
So I think I'm going to try to refocus my blog. Not that anyone is currently paying attention to it -- I'm barely paying attention to it. But I'm turning over a new leaf -- really, I am! Rather than pontificate on current events, I'm going to take a look back. Tell some stories, so to speak. So here's the first one.
Nearly 13 years ago, I met hottie at a Halloween party in Madison. And while I don't remember the exact order of events, I do know that the first time he walked me home was when a ridiculous bar fight broke out at the Depot in Madison. It was between two groups of guys -- both of who were my friends. Hottie belonged to one group and when I walked out the bar in disgust, he walked out with me and proceeded to walk me home. He gave me the most gentlemanly kiss on my front porch and invited me to the upcoming Halloween party at his house. A few days later, I went to that Halloween party and that was it! I was smitten.
So dear little Wyatt -- what story will we tell him when he gets old enough? Do we just say we met in college? Or do we tell him about the bar fight, in order to educate him about our nonviolent ways? If he is good at math, he will realize that we were both underage at the bar, but maybe he won't do the calculation right away. And maybe he won't care. Will we tell him that his dad's group of friends were pizza drivers and that the other group of guys all made sub sandwiches at Big Mike's? Will we tell him we met around Halloween in Madison? Or just that we were in Madison?
Who knows. But it is funny to think about. I'm so lucky that I walked out of that bar that night. And that the hottie came with me.
