Job Options

I spent the morning looking through the classifieds. There just isn't that much out there. Ugh! I can find plenty of jobs for other people, but finding one for myself is a different story. And at this point, I'm not even sure what kind of job I want. I'd like to work downtown (but mostly because I'm cheap and I don't want to buy a second car) and I'd like to be able to spend some amount of my day writing. And I'd like to work with a team of people who aren't assholes. Now that can be tricky, but I think it's do-able. Plus, I don't mind one or two assholes, just not an office full of them.

I keep thinking about being a postal worker. Now I know this job has a bad reputation (hence the expression, "going postal"), but I really have such an affinity for mail that it can't be that bad. I think having a daily route that you walk where you get to know the dogs and cats, the neighbors who get Netflix, the magazine subscriptions and whatnot. Unfortunately, people don't send each other good mail much these days. So maybe being a postal worker would just remind me of how much I lament our lack of good mail these days. Maybe it wouldn't be such a good idea after all.

I've also thought of the days I spent as a pizza driver working at Pizza Extreme. Everyone is always in need of a pizza driver. But I wonder what the advent of the Atkins is doing to the pizza industry. "Can I have a pizza with sausage, pepperoni and extra cheese? Oh, and can you hold the crust please?"

Maybe I'll just watch a movie instead. Maybe an afternoon watching "Office Space" will remind me of why it's good to be in transition and out of cube-land.

Relax....

My mom summed it up well yesterday. We met for coffee when she was done with work. We talked for awhile about what we've been up to and she just looked at me and said, "You are the busiest unemployed person I've ever met." I thought about that and realized that I am probably the only unemployed person she's ever met, but who wants to split hairs. She has a good point. The thing is, I really like most everything I'm doing and I'm not good at sitting still. I suppose the buddhist monks work on that whole clearing your mind and sitting still thing and I don't know that I am cut out for such work. That would be difficult work, I think. Some days, I feel like my brain is busting open with ideas and thoughts and new things to try and see. It's like some out of control garden up there in my brain. Maybe the monks have found a way to cultivate their gardens and to winter them over at times. Maybe that is what meditation is really all about. It's about being able to make your brain hibernate so that when spring comes, it's busting over with good things because it's had time to rest. Hm...I may have to look into that. Maybe I'll add that to my list....

The Middle Ground

I've figured it out. The problem with my finding a job is that I'm too experienced and not experienced enough. There is this miserable middle ground in corporate America that is Not an assistant/Not a director/Once was a manager. Welcome to my middle earth people. My one wish is that this middle earth be full of more hobbits because at least hobbits are cute and they seemingly like to eat good food.

No, it is white-collar middle-manager middle earth. It's the stuff that movies like Office Space are made of. And by the way, you should check out your hobbit name. Mine is Tigerlily Grubb.

But then again, it could just be that I'm looking in the wrong place and that corporate America has given me all it has to give. And now it's time for Tigerlilly Grubb to get out there and find something else.

art is not science

On another note. I'd like to share a story about creativity. I've been taking creative writing classes for the last year. My inner English major had some angst and needed an outlet. But since I've been unemployed, I've had the worst case of writer's block yet. It's maddening to be unable to do something that you like to do. For months, I'd thought if I only had time, I could write hundreds of stories and either improve my ability to tell stories or make my husband crazy from having to read them. And suddenly I was granted time....unemployment! And suddenly, no matter how hard I tried, nothing would come out. I would agonize over a half of a page of writing that was absolute crap. It was maddening.

So I went to my friend's house for a drawing lesson. I'm a terrible drawer (and for years I thought that this was a skill you are born with, but now I realize that it is like writing...you can be born with talent, but everyone can improve by working on skill). So we sat down and sketched for a few hours. In the process of sketching, my friend gave me tips and feedback. I spent too much time on the details and not enough time drawing the broad strokes at the beginning, so once my sketch was complete, it was entirely out of scale.

I took that to heart and tried again. My sketches improved (though certainly not enough to merit a new career in drawing) and I felt great about it. As I drove home, I thought about drawing the broad strokes and realized that my writing had suffered from the same malady. I spent too much time on the details before I'd sketched out the broad strokes of the story. I needed to take a step back and think about the whole of the story before writing every little detail in. The detail could be filled in later.

At home, I sat and wrote for nearly 8 hours. Not that I'm writing a masterpiece mind you, but my writer's block is gone (at least temporarily) and I learned that art feeds art. Art comes in so many shapes and sizes and it's good to challenge yourself in a multitude of areas to rekindle that creative spark. I was thrilled and just had to share. There's my creative story for the week. Or the day.

are you available for an informational interview?

So informational interview after informational interview. They all are beginning to make me think one thing. Start a company. The more I think about that idea and let it percolate in my mind, the less nerve-wracking it seems. I mean, it still seems scary, but can it be more scary that walking into a company on the top floor of one of the tallest buildings in Minneapolis and having a conversation with the company's senior vice president? I mean, it's just me. How hard can that be? Ask me tomorrow and I may feel completely the opposite, but today it seems like the most realistic and right thing to do.

But of course, this comes on the same day that I may get a phone interview at a place that I think I would really like to work. Coincidence? Perhaps. Thank goodness I have a vacation scheduled. A vacation from my vacation, I guess that's what you would call it. Unemployment has got to be the weirdest non-vacation I've experienced, though. And everyone could use a vacation from that. And now that I've fulfilled my goal of writing the word "vacation" 5 times, I guess I'm done for the day. Ciao.

jobs

Applying for jobs is tiring. So many resumes and cover letters and each one has to be customized just right and painstakingly agonized over. And after spending a few months out of corporate america, well, who really wants to go back to that?

I just lucked out when I first entered the job market. I could quit my job without anything lined up and be employed two days later. It was amazing. That is certainly not the case now. And it's not that I'm completely spoiled. It's just that I'm doing battle between wanting to be picky and wanting to be employed. And I just haven't seen anything on monster.com lately, except a lot of work-from-home postings. I already work from home, why would I want to pay someone to teach me how?

I suppose what I should really do is read more. I'm already reading the New Yorker cover to cover. But I could up it and be more diligent about salon.com and the daily misleader. Or I could play more bookworm. Ah, the choices.

day 1.

in a sense, i think i came to the party a bit late, but maybe not. unemployment causes you to find new ways to spend time. i'm sick to death of cleaning, so i thought i'd try blogging. i think it will be an improvement.

see, like all those who initially said, "when one door closes, another one opens," those are all people who think they are locating that silver lining for you. like you didn't already know that. i looked forward to a day when i wouldn't have to work in a cubicle. and i'd have to say that it has its advantages. i don't have to block out the smell of mcdonalds every day, since my house doesn't smell like mcdonalds. i don't have to answer stupid questions all day long, that's a bonus. i also don't have any idea how many people discussed janet jackson and whether anyone noticed that kerry has won nearly all of the primaries. my finger is so far off the pulse. luckily, the employed member of my household usually fills me in on the day's news. but i just wonder, how long does it take before you start to lose social skills? and how will i know once it happens?